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This was the scene that greeted me yesterday when I arrived to collect Jasper from my parents, after they insisted on babysitting whilst I went to meet a friend who owns cats. A string of sausages, not only snapped clean in half but absolutely shredded.

I offered to hoover up for them but they declined, perfectly happy to do so themselves having experienced unbridled delight all afternoon, it seemed.

I despair, I really do.

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